Second is hard.
Like...supremely. Seriously, I racked my brain to figure a out a way to deliver something fresh/interesting/amusing without giving you the same/boring/stupid. I wanted to talk about how the movie was going. I wanted to compliment my actors. I wanted to express feelings of fear/jealousy/competition for my Indy film making brethren. I wanted to take my head and put it on the page. And I wanted to do it In Brief. They call it 'The Sophomore Slump' (almost the title for this piece) for a reason, y'know? Well, it wasn't easy, but, after much deliberation/head banging/tears I believe I have found the perfect device by which to speak my piece. I title this composition: An Intimate Conversation with the Powers That Be (Part 2) FADE IN: INT. living room of rob's mind - anytime ROB is sitting on the couch, arms spread over the back of it, head back, eyes closed. MASSIVE SPEAKERS blast music by (the-one-and-only) Thomas Newman. From down the hall enters ROB's BRAIN (BRAIN) holding his ears and frowning. He starts in with, BRAIN Geebees, can you turn it down? You're going to rock me loose it's so loud. ROB (eyes still closed) Thinkin'. BRAIN Oh like I don't know. The violins, the smell of frying synapses. I can't tell if it's a barbecue or a funeral. The music comes down of its own accord. ROB Dude, I don't have that much brain power to begin with- BRAIN -Got that right- ROB -so let's not waste precious processing power on snarky one liners. BRAIN 'Precious Processing Power'. Say that three times fast- ROB -Let's, just, not, okay? Can we not? I've got stuff percolating up here. BRAIN Yeah, I saw your thought queue. You're really worried about the movie, huh? ROB I dunno. I guess. BRAIN Things are going fine! ROB It's not that- BRAIN Then what is it? Really? Cause some of this is my department and some of it isn't. ROB I dunno, man. I just keep waiting for the other shoe to drop. Things have been going so well...I don't want to screw things up. BRAIN Translation: you've talked so much crap about other film makers, now your movie's on the chopping block and you're nervous. ROB Well, BRAIN So this is about your ego. ROB It is and it isn't. BRAIN What you just said doesn't make any sense. ROB Okay it is! But I've had my nose in the dirt for almost ten years. I know I can suss out a project that sounds better, looks better- BRAIN -You don't want it to suck. I copy. ROB Hey look, I'm not doing this for bragging rights- BRAIN Liar. Own up to your prideful aspirations. You'll sleep better. ROB Fine. It's about pride. But after ten years of being committed-nay- married to the...method of film making, I don't think a little bit of pride is too much to ask for. BRAIN Kid, I got news for you: If you're not ready now, you're never gonna be. And now your wife, your friends/family and those nice, talented folks you aren't paying are looking at you to deliver- ROB No pressure- BRAIN -there's tons of pressure, but this is YOU said YOU wanted to do. This is YOUR dream. YOUR vision. So man up, put on your big boy pants and do the damn thing. From beyond the room, a woman's voice. Faint, but getting louder. VOICE OVER Rob? ROB Just like that? BRAIN You're being summoned. And yes. VOICE OVER Baby? ROB Good talk. BRAIN Good luck. FADE TO white. FADE IN: INT. rob's actual living room - now Rob pulls off his headphones and opens his eyes. Staring back at him is his lovely (and talented) wife, MICHA. Micha Hon? I'm sorry. Were you sleeping? ROB Not really. Sort of...lost in thought. MICHA Okay...anything you want to talk about? ROB Nah. I'm good now. MICHA You're sure? ROB (breathes out) I am. FADE OUT. Fin.
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Robert Hagans
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October 2010
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